Fun fact: Mexico will pay you 5,000 pesos a month to plant trees on your land.

My dickhead HOA will send ladies over with tape measures and fine you and sicc letters on you from attorneys bitching about your unapproved trees and plants.

I don’t know. I sat there in the front yard with my coffee and hand watered the plants. I looked at it and emailed them to tell them to fuck off , that my yard was pretty cool , unlike any other on the street , and that I’m glad their reign of tyranny would be over soon.

I’m glad I have an offer on the place.

Otherwise I’d have a half a mind to do something with one of those gawd damn trees that would make my mother, if not the trees ancestors, very proud of me.

I don’t get these yapping hysterical yuppie dickheads who find any signs of life, inside or outside of your home, so offensive but they can stick my trees up their pinched and pained asses sideways.

I’m just like oh my god , get me somewhere out in the woods or cactuses where I can plant and tend to whatever the fuck i want and no one will pay me any mind.

I am so fucking tired of white people telling me what to do all the way down to what fucking crayons to use in class.