On 11/11/15 I found myself in one of those stuffy old church basements somewhere in Texas again, actually identifying with what a speaker had to say for himself for the first time that I could recall in ages.

Some dude I was crushing on had a tattoo of Isaiah 41:10: “Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.” 

I looked at the clock and noticed that it was 11:11. So I made a wish: I wished that I would never have to sit in another goddamned meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous in Austin TX again.

I put the house back on the market the next day.

Then I threw all my shit away, and I moved back to Los Angeles four days later.
Fuck wishing: I make things happen.

The house was under contract in five days, we closed in January.

I’d owned it for 5 years and it was as hard for me to let go of a house and all of my stuff as I guess it is for anyone else. Thats quite a long time for me to stay in one place.

It was a really cute place but I honestly don’t miss the $250 bills from Austin Energy. I don’t miss mowing the lawn. I don’t miss the demon possessed circuit breaker panel that neither myself nor three electricians ever managed to solve.
I do, however, miss my sunflowers and working from home out on the deck under the Texas sun. I’ve driven over a million miles now and when I started this trip I hit a tumbleweed about the size of a deer.

I felt bad for running my mascot over.

Some guy I’ve talked to in passing on and off for the last few years said hi and I really just wanted to turn the car around, drive the 160 miles, and crawl into his bed because being held sounds a lot better than whatever else I’ve got going on right now.

There were dozens of tumbleweeds rolling around on the interstate at 11:11 last night. Oh well, these are my friends now.

I was supposed to find out on Wednesday if I’m being transferred to another team in Belgium, so I’m in between places and it’s kind of hard to plan for the future right now.

This is one of the few times that I’m not drifting around and indecisive about my future by choice. If they say no, that’s fine. I’ll just go get an apartment and have my car fixed. I like the job I already have and I am okay with both outcomes.
I was originally going to shelter in place in Los Angeles for a few weeks and maybe hit some of those meetings up again. They were kind of entertaining in LA.

But instead I found myself rolling my eyes and thinking “You did that for eight years and those people wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire.”

So I’m just going to key it up and try somewhere else this time.